Self-Conscious

Self-Conscious -1

I have always been very self-conscious with my body and skin. It’s something that I am still struggling with, but I have been trying my best to overcome it.

Like everything else it takes time. I am learning to feel more comfortable in my body and skin, it has not been an easy road.

My struggles…

Ever since I was merely two years old I suffered from severe eczema, the kind of eczema where I couldn’t walk. My skin was in complete agony… Being that young and having to be hospitalised for my skin disease took quite a toll on my psyche. 

As you can imagine growing up with a skin disease, wasn’t easy for me. Kids can be extremely cruel and I was tormented all through my school years. Let’s just say I am so happy I am not in school anymore.

Primary school was hell… Also, I grew up with only one parent who couldn’t afford the type of treatments I needed. Fast forward to the age of 28, I still suffer from eczema and most probably will for the rest of my life.

Getting Over It…

Luckily it’s not as bad. I’ve grown out of it, but oh man, has it done a number on my self-esteem. I still suffer from bad scars that most probably won’t go away. I have never felt comfortable in skirts and shorts, which I still won’t wear out unless I am home.

Going through all that has made me feel extremely bad about myself. As much as my amazing fiancé makes me feel specials and tells me daily how beautiful I am. My scars are skin deep…

I am getting better at how I see myself though, makeup has been a way to make me feel good about myself. I’ve also been going makeup-free more often. I don’t want to rely on makeup to help me feel good about myself. Which is why I decided to go makeup free more often to help myself heal from my insecurities regarding my body and skin.

It feels good having to get this off my chest, it has been amazing writing down how I feel… I am sure many other women have been dealing with their own insecurities which media it’s hard not to feel self-conscious in a world where media celebrates perfection, or at least their idea of perfection. Which honestly disgusts me. Many brands though have been invested in showing diversity which I really admire, it makes us feel so much better than there are others with real struggles.

18 Comments

  1. July 30, 2018 / 10:43 am

    Wow, I would never have known you have scars! You must cover them up well, or maybe they’re not as bad as you think! I used to have scars from acne but most have faded now as I’ve gotten older.

    Corinne x

    • July 30, 2018 / 11:23 am

      Most of my scars are actually over my body and legs! So cover them with wearing long clothes haha but yeah hopefully with time they will go away. Just makes me very self conscious about myself.

  2. July 30, 2018 / 12:01 pm

    Hey Candice, you are an amazing and beautiful woman. We all have our insecurities but we must never allow it to consume us. I love reading your posts and even though we have never met I can sense that you are such a lovely person xxx

    • July 30, 2018 / 12:23 pm

      Aw thank you so much Radia! I really appreciate it

  3. July 30, 2018 / 1:47 pm

    Candice, thanks so much for sharing your story. It’s horrible to hear what you have been through with your eczema. I’m glad it’s not as severe now and that you are feeling more confident as time goes on.

    Have a great week.
    Gemma x

    • July 30, 2018 / 2:44 pm

      Aw thank you so much Gemma! It has been a struggle and I have always felt so ashamed I felt like I really needed to open up about my struggles.

    • July 30, 2018 / 2:44 pm

      Thank you so much Laura I really appreciate the love and support you have always shown me.

  4. July 30, 2018 / 3:02 pm

    You’re so strong!!! Very inspiring!
    I love the photo! ♥
    My skin is bad too although maybe camera makes it look better. I have a big a scar (not on face) as well….:(

  5. July 30, 2018 / 3:07 pm

    Kids can be so awful and they don’t realise how much it can actually affect someone at that age, you are beautiful and for anyone to ever tell you different is a shame on them xxx

    http://www.iridescentplaces.com

    • July 30, 2018 / 3:15 pm

      Aww thank you so much Caroline I really appreciate it

  6. August 2, 2018 / 11:26 pm

    Thank you for being so open and sharing your story! I think we all struggle as women when it comes to our bodies. I just thought about writing an article on what would happened if we loved ourselves. I think there is so much power in embracing our uniqueness and what makes us truly special. There is nothing wrong with any of our bodies, they are all beautiful! Thanks for inspiring. XO, Ellese

    Rock.Paper.Glam.

    • August 3, 2018 / 6:43 am

      Thank you Ellese you should definitely write that post I’m curious to read it!

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